


Bonding because of my no good flower eating guinea pig

by Such_Funk



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Gardening, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, M/M, Sadness, Sick Character, if you dont comment ill cry, lmao please comment, this is why we can't have anything nice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-08-02 08:10:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16301351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Such_Funk/pseuds/Such_Funk
Summary: No, he's not a hamster. No, he's not a gerbil. No. He's my terrible no good guinea pig who's favorite thing to do is ruin my social life.





	1. Beautiful gardens; horrid houses

Chirping keeps me up all night, you might think I own a parrot or macaw. But you'd be dead wrong. Because the only thing in the cage beside my bed is a no good spoiled guinea pig. A fat one too. He's like a Nana. Worn, old and fat but always seems to amaze you with how she can make you smile. He might be a no good spoiled rotten guinea pig, but I love my Bluebell.

Wrustling of a bag will always get his attention; You could scream for hours and he wouldn't bat an eye. But the momento you dare open a bag in his earshot you've got the rage of a million starved people on your hands.  
His teeth knawed on the bars of the cage and it was almost as if I could hear him. "Loviono, feed meee. My stomach craves the nutritional treats only you can provide me."  
My eyes narrow as the grip on my crisps tightens. "No puta." I growl scornfully, my hand retreating into my salty wonders. Bluebell keeps nibbling on the bar, his eyes holding all his hatred for me. I swear if he could he'd kill me instantly for a pepper platter.  
I sigh, looking down at myself. I'm a mess.  
I wouldn't really call myself poor, a better choice of words would be economically challenged. His pleas grew louder as I held a chip between my teeth, cracking it down the middle.  
My house does have a pretty secure fence... And it's not too hot outside.. Bluebell seems sick of his cage. Bluebell looks me into the eyes, seemingly think the same as I. "Loviono you pale bastard, get some sunlight with me or I'll eat your shoe."  
Before I know it, I have a rambunctious boar in my hands, begging to be freed from my grasp and allowed to frolick. My knees hit the grass and a golden yellow guinea pig leaves my hands. Wheeking fills the air as he munches know grass and has a small fight with a small bird. Of course he's raised by me and made the bird scram. But as I look over the poorly painted picket fence I see the exact opposite of the house residing. A beautiful garden, Spanish blue bells and lilacs along the perimeter of the fence, almost as it was mocking me for my measly yard. I know the grass was torn up.. And I don't mow too often. But you know what? At least my house has a better paint job and I can have pride in that. I lean against the fence, my eyes following the mass of colors. Bees floating above the fine scented scenery. I honestly found it weird to think about how something so beautiful is alive. What kind of person takes this much time out of there day to take care of something as stupid as a garden. Flowers can't even give you nose kisses. Not that Bluebell does that!  Bluebell. Awh hell, where did that little monster go?! My heart rate started to pick up as ran across the yard, careful not to step on any potentional guinea pigs. My heart suddenly stopped when I heard loud screaming accompained wheeking. My boots almost burned grass as I followed the screaming, only to see myself come upon a tan man cowering from Bluebell. He was eating all of the flowers like a champ. I mean,  I should probably scold him right? The man had tan skin and black hair turning to curls at certain points. Two tubes were in his nose, looping around his ears and connecting down the front of his chest. It reminded me of earbuds. I couldn't help but feel pity at the sight. I hoped over the fence, mentally cursing to myself. "I am so so sorry, " I began, grabbing Bluebell. The smug bastard still held a piece the massacred garden. "Is there anything I can do to help.." I paused, not knowing his name. Should I know his name? We have been neighbors for about a month now. "Antonio." he filled in for me, sighing as he recollected himself. "Please, do not bring your rodent near me again.." Antonio started to murmur, looking down at the remains of his garden. 

His sad expression says it all. I might fucking hate his stupid garden and stupid house and stupid paint. But I did screw up his stupid flowers.. 


	2. How to get along with a weed chewer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loviono has to help this strange man with flowers. But really who has gardens?

I hate dirt.  
I hate flowers.  
And I hate my stupid no good spoiled rotten flower eating guinea pig. 

 

Antiono was a strange man. A really strange man.  
He never invited me inside. Ever. Man, he's a terrible host. He hands me a red plastic cup filled the the brim with ice and water, a small rainbow striped straw. "Gracias.." I grumbled under my breath, not even looking the man jnto the eyes. "Don't be so aggressive, Chico.." the man said, sitting down on his knees beside me.  
He told me he wouldn't charge me for his flowers if he helped me plant some for the fall. I honestly wonder what the dude does in the winter. I wouldn't be surprised if he had a green house somewhere I'm not seeing. Crazy bastard. I could feel the dirt getting under my nails as I gripped the dead flowers from the ground and shoved them into a plastic Walmart bag. I swear dread leaked from my pores into the air because I heard him sigh. "Flowers are good friends," He spoke softly. "I like to give them names..but removing them is the hardest part. But they can't survive the colder weather.." He caressed the petal of one of the beautiful bluebells. The petal had began to die. Crisping off at the edge and slowly turning to dust as he smoothed it with his finger. I grumble a bit, the fact that his only friends are flowers sure does make him seem real sane. He looks like he belongs inside a hospital or maybe a psych ward. His skin was pale even for being in the sun so much and the stupid tubes up his stupid nose only compliment that. It reminded me of those crazy straws mama would get us. They go behind your ears and to your mouth. Stupid. He must of caught me staring because his face emitted a small blush before looking back down at his flowers. A moment of silence between us was cut short by his stupid voice. "You've been helping me a lot, Loviono. Would you like to join me for dinner?" It seemed like my world froze. I only knew this crazy man for a week and he's inviting me in for dinner. Dinner. Dinner with him! What horrors await me? Will he chop me up and use me as fertilizer for his retarded flowers? I don't trust him. Not at all. "..Okay." What. WHAT. Did I just agree to eat dinner with him?! Sweet fucking Jesus.


End file.
